When I woke up I ran my hands all over myself checking to see if anything had happened. The room had a strange smell to it and I realized it was the smell of sex. I'd smelt it after Nurse Violet and Dr. Cole had done it while I was "asleep." I don't think he did anything to me because I didn't feel any different but I knew they had done something. I could see another cot had been pushed up next to mine almost touching it like a double bed. I let out an uneasy sigh then tried to figure out how many days it had been since my phone call but I had lost all sense of time, I couldn't be sure how long I'd slept.
Dr. Cole came into the room a few minutes later with a new stack of files. He set them down on his desk and got to work. From there we went about our normal routine. When he wheeled me around the hospital I kept a look out for any sign my parents might have dropped by but everything seemed normal. I began to worry they might not come even after what I had said. I guess they really didn't care about me.
However, the next day, after we'd finished lunch and were just settling into our afternoon routine, Nurse Violet strode into the room. My cot had me sitting upright, and I was doing a puzzle on a serving tray. I couldn't help but notice her heels sounded louder then usual and looked up from my puzzle. She had a smug look on her face as she glared at me. Dr. Cole didn't look up, or if he did, it was faster then I had. She walked right up to his desk and stomped her foot.
Dr. Cole still didn't look up as he jotted down some notes, he simply sighed and said, "What is it now, Violet."
"You'll never guess who is here?" said Nurse Violet, again she looked at me.
I perked up, realizing this might be it, the moment I'd been waiting for! Dr. Cole finally lifted his head up, he saw Nurse Violet and I staring at each other and was finally interested. He turned to Nurse Violet and asked, "Who?"
"Why Mr. and Mrs. Greene!" said Nurse Violet not taking her eyes off me.
"What." said Dr. Cole.
"Yes, they've just arrived after diving three days to get here and they're quite upset. Apparently they are under the impression you've been mistreating their daughter and are demanding to take her home."
If I could have, I would have shot out of my hospital bed. They'd done it! They had really come and were demanding to take me home! THEY BELIEVED ME! Dr. Cole dropped his pen and yet again said "What!" Before adding "Where are they getting this from?"
"Yes, well," said Nurse Violet. She sat on the edge of his desk and crossed her arms as she kept looking at me and continued, "Apparently Hannah here, called home the other day and got her mother all worked up. I guess now we know what she was up to, her so called "exercise."
Dr. Cole pulled back in his chair taking it all in. "I see." He said turning in my direction. He did not look happy. In fact they were both leering at me. This tempered my excitement some but I wasn't going to let them squash it. The cat was finally out of the bag and it was time to get out of here.
"Please!" I pleaded trying to reason with them, "PLEASE JUST LET THEM TAKE ME HOME! PLEASE!" I lied saying "I promise I wont tell anyone what you've all been doing here."
"And JUST what have we been doing?" Nurse Violet spat.
"I don't know." I said realizing now was still probably not the best moment to express what I did and did not know. No I couldn't let things slip until I was free from this place, safe and free from them.
"Then you don't have anything to tell." she said flatly.
Dr. Cole wiped his mouth as I continued to plead. "PLEASE JUST LET ME GO HOME! I WANT TO GO HOME WITH MY MOM AND DAD! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLE-"
"ENOUGH!' Dr. Cole snapped before calmly turning to Nurse Violet, "Take them to my office, then inform Hogan of the situation."
"Of course." said Nurse Violet. She got off his desk, gave me a sour look then turned on her heels and left the room.
Dr. Cole sat for a moment longer thinking, his hand resting on his chin. Eventually he let out a heavy sigh, stood and slowly said. "Hannah, Hannah, Hannah, I thought we had come to an understanding."
"Please, I beg of you. Just let me go!"
He flared his nostrils and let out a heavy sigh before he said. "You are determined, I'll give you that, even bedridden, you still managed to cause such trouble."
"Please, please, you can't keep me here forever, eventually I'll get out of here one way or another!"
He shook his head, "We discussed this Hannah. You are not well and you are not leaving anytime soon, if ever."
If ever...IF EVER! He had to know that set me off! I'd told him how upset I'd been over what he'd said. "You discussed it!" I protested.
He came over to my cot. "Yes and you said you understood."
"And I do," I spat "You are the one that is not well. You are the crazy one!"
"Am I now?" he said in a condescending tone. "Well I beg to differ. You are not a professional. What would you know of crazy?"
"Professional!" I scoffed. I couldn't help myself. I couldn't hold it in any longer, "Drugging and raping your patients isn't very "professional, Dr Cole." I gave the most spiteful look I could manage with one eye.
He paused and tilted his head down at me. His mouth grew small, for a moment as he pursed his lips. The cat was definitely out of the bag now! There was no turning back anymore! I held my breath as I waited for a response, given how unstable he was, I wasn't quite sure how he'd react and had to be ready for anything. He turned away from me after a moment, his fists began to shake and I wondered if he wanted to hit me again like the other day.
"This is new." he finally said. His voice was oddly calm and his hand suddenly stopped shaking.
"What?" I said finally exhaling.
"Your latest delusion. Am I to be the bad guy now?" he said turning back to me.
"YOU ARE THE BAG GUY!"
He laughed, straight up laughed like all of this was hilarious. "My, my Hannah, you are getting sicker by the moment. Not even sticking to your original story but coming up with a new one all together. Or wait does this still fit your narrative?"
The way he spoke to me was so vile and condescending. His tone was lighthearted, like someone reacting to a child telling them a story that was incoherent yet they still pretended to understand. I grimaced at him and he suddenly stepped up to the cot. Without warning his hand flew out and his open palm hit me squarely in the chest. He sent me flying back in the bed. I sent the small tray table flying and puzzle pieces went everywhere as he'd knocked the air out of my lungs.
I began madly coughing and wheezing gasping for air as he calmly adjusted the bed to lie flat then began strapping me to the bed. "We shall have to discuss this latest, delusions of yours, when I get back. I look forward to hearing all about it but sadly I have to go and clean up another one of your messes."
"I- I-"cough cough cough "I am-" cough, cough, "not-" cough cough "I struggled to speak as I tried to catch my breath.
He finished tying my arms and leg to the cot and checked to make sure they were secure before he looked down at me and snarled. "Save your breath!" He stood up then adjusted his sunglasses. He fixing suit and tie, then smoothed out all the wrinkles of his doctors coat. Once he was presentable he crossed the room to the double doors. Just before he left he said, "I shouldn't be long and don't worry I'll sen them your love."
"BASTARD!" I choked a good minute or two after he'd already walked through the doors.
I continued to cough and gasp for air as I tried to get free but I couldn't move my arms and I could only wiggle my good leg. I had to get out of here! I HAD TO GET TO MY PARENTS! THIS WAS MY LAST CHANCE! I struggled with all my might but couldn't get free. If anything I only scooted the bed slightly or lifted it off its leg a little on one side.
I screamed at the top of my lungs, hoping my parents would hear me. I didn't know how far it was from here to Dr. Cole's office but I hoped my screams would reach the entire hospital. I hoped my parents would know it was me and come running. I screamed and screamed as loud as I could, probably louder then I ever had in this entire life. I screamed until my voice cut out and then I started to cry but I still didn't give up.
I kept struggling against my binding but knew it was pointless. I was just tiring myself out. I was so emotional and upset, I wasn't thinking clearly. I needed to stop lashing out and focus my thoughts. I stopped struggling and quietly wept as I tried to think back on other lives. There had been times I had been in situation such as this, if not worse. A lot of times I had my powers and could escape with ease but there were a lot of lives, where I had nothing but my will power.
I bit my lip staring up at the ceiling. I would not give up. Even if all the odds were against me I would get out of this room. I would see my parents again and I would escape this awful nightmare. I took several deep breaths then thought, what if anything could I do right now. Screaming at the top of my lungs and failing about wasn't helping.
I needed to be strategic. I moved once more only differently this time. I focused on my right arm, then my left and finally my leg. I moved each binding slowly as much as I could in every direction. I put various pressures on each of my straps and found one was weaker then the others. I saw that some of the threads attaching the strap to the bed had frayed.
I was reminded of a blanket my grandmother had mended. She showed me how when things get old or worn the seams would come apart. The hospital was old...these beds in the ward were old. People usually only came here if they were sick and weak. They were usually sedated or monitored and didn't have the time nor strength to work their bindings.
I focused all my efforts on that one strap. I wiggled my arm and body about in various ways applying pressure. The room was so quiet I could hear it ripping. I don't know how long it took but I managed to yank the strap away from the bed, freeing my arm. It was red and awfully raw but I'd done it! I hadn't given up and had freed a hand!
I let out a deep sigh but knew this was only the beginning. I still had to untie myself, then get up and out of here. Finally, I'd find Dr. Cole's office and my parents. I nodded more determined then ever. I suddenly felt this strange surge of inner strength. I wasn't sure if I was bluffing out my ass of it was my adrenaline but I didn't care. I was getting out of here! I was getting out of here.
I repeated my the mantra in my head as I undid the strap on my other arm. It wasn't easy. I couldn't see it very well as it was on the side I'd lost my eye. It took longer then I liked but I managed to feel around and get it undone. I sat up then and didn't spare a second getting my leg undone. From there I swung my legs off the cot and onto the floor.
Now, I licked my lips, came the hard part. I had a decision to make. The wheelchair or the crutches. The wheelchair would make it so I'd only have to use my hands but the crutches would let me use stairs. I wasn't the best on them but I knew I needed more maneuverability. From my walks with Dr. Cole, I also knew there were places my chair had gotten stuck and needed to be lifted. I didn't think I could lift the chair on my own and walk.
I struggled to my feet, hopping on to my good foot. I was reminded of how I used to hop around as a kid. Now my freedom and possibly my life depended on it. The crutches weren't next to the bed but leaned up against a wall near a window. When finally reached them I let myself rest for only a second then tucked them under my arms.
I found it easier to move around with them, then hopping on one foot, but it was still hard. I was getting tired and I hadn't even made it out of the room yet. At this rate I was going to be exhausted by the time I reached Dr. Cole's office but I didn't care. I could rest when this was all over and Dr. Cole and this place was far behind me.
I hobbled toward the double doors at the other end of the room, thinking this was a poorly designed room. As I drew closer I heard something, ever so faintly over the sound of my heart beat., heels on a wooden floor. NO! NO! NO! I looked around there wasn't anywhere to hide. That BITCH Nurse Volatile was coming back and I knew I couldn't overpower her, so so so surprise was my only hope.
I moved to the double doors but didn't go through them. I hobbled off just to the side of them then turned my back against the wall. With not a second to spare, the double doors opened and she stepped into the room. From the corner of my eye I could see she was carrying something, a tray, as she walked right past me.
She called out in a sing-songy tone, "Time for your...medicine-" She trailed off at the end realizing I wasn't there. Her back was to me as she said, "Shit?"
She looked around no doubt thinking I couldn't have gotten far but she underestimated me. I hopped to my good foot and then jumped forward. I let go of one of my crutches and grasped hold of the other with two hands. She was turning round and jumped when the other crutch hit the floor. She quickly spun as I swung but it was too late for her. Treating my crutch like a baseball bat I swung as hard as I could, colliding with her face.
I heard the sickening crunch as it connected and she flew to the ground. The tray and my medication fell to the floor. She was still moving but I swung and swung falling to the ground as I made damn sure she stayed down. Pain rippled through my bad leg and I was sure I'd hurt it again as I landed hard on the floor. It was in a cast but I'd still managed to bend it slightly. I let out a roar of frustration with her, the pain, this situation, EVERYTHING but I got my ass up. I grabbed my now bloody crutch and the other one that had fallen getting to my feet. I hobbled out into the hall and saw I could go in three directions but each one had a security gate at the end.
"MOTHER FUCKER!" I cursed out loud. My voice echoed through the hall.
I knew this wasn't going to be easy but talk about impossible. I turned back to Nurse Volatile she had to have a set of keys on her, right? I went back into the room and poked her with my crutch. She had a pair on her hip. Normally it would have taken me a minute maybe less to bend down and get them if I weren't injured but I swear it was another ten minutes on the floor up and then back up and out.
Again I had three choices before me. I worried I'd choose wrong or even get lost but as I picked a direction, I noticed a hospital map on the wall. It was a new one as it listed Dr. Cole's office. It had to be one of his ideas. I cackled madly thinking one of his "improvements" would be his downfall. I loved the irony and made my way to his office.
I set off full of vigor but it soon faded as it took me forever and a day to get there. I moved so slow, I could lose a race to a snail. Every time I heard a noise I'd also have to try and hide. I worried another orderly, nurse or even Hogan might find me out and I'd be done for. On top of everything, it didn't help that there were three security gates on the way and a hundred keys. Why they needed this many was beyond me but it took time, all of it took so much time, I didn't have.
I couldn't afford to get to Dr. Cole's office and find my parents had already left. I tried to move faster but it wasn't easy, my bad leg had started bleeding. I knew that couldn't be good. I thought it was healing up but it hadn't been that long and I guess when I fell to the floor it was worse then I thought. I got to the last security gate, according to the map and finally recognized where I was. I knew this part of the hospital. I could see the door to my room and saw the glass had been shattered. I knew Mikey had popped the door with a crowbar but I didn't remember him shattering the glass. Maybe it had happened afterwards.
I ignored it and focusing on what lie further down the hall and up half a level, Dr. Cole's office. I hoped my parents would still be there and that seeing me like this would be enough to convince them Dr. Cole was a liar or at least that this asylum wasn't for me. Even...even if they still thought I was crazy, they couldn't keep me in a place that would allow me to get such injuries, right?
I began looking for the key to the gate but dropped the keys. My hands were all sweaty and shaking. I don't know if it was from the excitement, fear or adrenaline. Maybe it was a mixture of everything I knew the next few minutes were very important. I got down, grabbed the keys then got up again. I heard voices and looked down the hall to see a woman stepping out of Dr. Cole's office followed by a man, my parents!
"I still don't understand how this could have happened." my father said. I could tell from the sound of his voice he was upset.
"Couldn't we just see her like last time, really quick. We came all this way please?" My mother cried.
Dr. Cole stepped out after them and sternly said, "I will not tell you again. I must do what is best for Hannah, and right now she isn't stable enough to see you. It would undermine all the progress we have made. I am once again truly sorry you came all this way but you should have-"
"MOTHER!" I screamed. I wasn't sure if my voice had anything left after all that screaming but it did.
All three of them turned to look at me and my mother cried out, "HANNAH!"
She rushed to me nearly tripping down the stairs. She got to the security gate and I could see the horror on her face. She looked different, tired but no it was more then that! Her hair had changed, she had more winkles on her face. It had been too long, far to long, since I had seen her. All the anger and bitterness I held faded as she cried, "WHAT HAPPENED!"
"I told you." I cried "Dr. Cole can't be trusted he lies." I moved my fingers through the holes of the security gate and she met them with her own. We held hands though the gate as I went on. "I tried to escape when I found out he'd been drugging and raping me but we, my friends and I crashed. Please. Please don't leave me here with him!"
"But he said!" My father took several step towards us, then paused, turning back to Dr. Cole. "What is the meaning of this!"
Dr. cold stood there, frozen for a few seconds. Then he spoke. I almost didn't catch it over my mother's and my cries. "So be it! If this is what you want! Once again Hannah, you had a choice!"
I didn't know what he meant by that. I didn't care. It was over! It was finally over. I watched as he turned on his heels. I thought he might be making a run for it, but he walked up to the nearby wall. There was a roll of fire hose and a fire ax hung on the wall. He carefully lifted the fire ax and then swung it around once before turning his attention to my father. Even as I saw what was happening I didn't realize what he was going to do.
"If you laid a finger on my daughter!" My father roared upset. I think I'd only ever heard that tone once or twice in my entire life. I knew it meant business! "I will- What do you think you are doing?"
I could see it now and realized. No! NO! "FATHER" I cried out as Dr. Cole strode toward my father.
My mother turned around and I screamed as Dr. Cole swung the fire ax and it collided. Everything was happening so fast but it all felt so slow. My father let out a roar of pain as the ax slashed his arm. He stumbled back raising up his arms. He tried to defend himself as my mother screamed. She pulled her hands from mine and we both watched as Dr. Cole swung on my father again. There wasn't much he could do. Dr. Cole was younger and stronger then him and he had a fucking fire ax! My father didn't' stand a chance!
My eye widened as the second swing nearly tore through his other arm. Blood splattered onto the floor and white cement walls. My father stumbled back and fell to the floor in such agony. He screamed like I had never heard him before, at the top of his lungs as Dr. Cole swung again and again. He severed my father's arm and leg before sinking the blade into his chest. Blood went everywhere with each swing, on the floors walls and Dr. Cole. My fathers screams damped and became a madding gurgled of blood that could barely be heard over my mother's and my horrific cries.
Dr. Cole rose the ax high above his head then suddenly turned his head in my direction. I knew this was it and so did he! I screamed as my mother instinctively rushed forward, towards her husband and the fire ax came down on my fathers head. It made a such a sound that I couldn't describe. Dr. Cole had….had killed him and he wasn't done. He jerked the fire ax from my father's head then turned his attentions to my mother as she instinctively rushed up. She quickly froze half way up the stairs realize Dr. Cole was coming after her.
She turned and rushed back to the security gate calling out to me. "HANNAH!'
I scrambled to find the right key as Dr. Cole strode forward. He jumped the few stairs down and landed on the same level as my mother as I pushed a key into the lock. It wouldn't turn nor the next one or the one after. My mother interlocked her fingers in the security gate's holes and hysterically rattled it as she kept calling out my name. "HANNAH! HANNAH!"
She pleaded for me to open it but there were so many keys, too many! My adrenaline spiked and my vision blurred. I felt like I was going to pass out as I moved faster then I ever had before. I stuck another key into the lock, no, another no, another no, another no, another no, another-
"Hannah!" I froze pulling from my haste. My mother was still screaming my name but what caught my attention was Dr. Cole calling out to me as well.
I looked up from the countless keys as he stood a few feet behind my mother with the fire ax. It was clear he wanted me to watch! He wanted me to see this! Everything else faded but him and my mother. She was still calling out to me as she madly shook the gate. She hadn't dared to turn around and I watched as the ax sliced through the air and into her from behind. Her eyes shot open and she cried out even more. Her entire body fell against the security gate. The ax had sunk in deep, so deep he had to yank it out but quickly swung it again and again as I stood there helplessly watching.
Her cries soon stopped as her body slumped to the ground. Once again blood went everywhere. At some point I dropped the keys in her blood as it pooled under the security gate. He kept going for a few minutes but eventually stopped and stood up straight, catching his breath. My eye was wide open and I looked at Dr. Cole, realizing in his frenzied swings, his sunglasses had fallen off.
I could see his eyes now. One was brown but the other was blue...ice blue!
"You, you, you're, UREL" I sputtered. The name slipped from my mouth for the first time in this life. Urel. Urel, that was the Shadow Man's 'true name.'
For a moment Dr. Cole froze then glared at me. He was still slightly winded from having killed my parents. He wiped his face smearing more blood across it as he said, "What are you babbling on about now?
"Your eye." I said "It's blue, ice blue!"
"Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha," He madly cackled. We were the only ones "alive" in the hall now and he cackled so loudly it echoed throughout. "I just hacked her parents to death, and all she cares about is my eye color." He titled his head "Lenses, love, corrective lenses.'
"Corrective lenses." I repeated.
"Yes," he said running his bloody hand through his hair. "I got them a few years back. They work like your standard glasses only they go on the eye itself. Darker tints help reduce my sensitivity but you can have any eye color you want these days. So you see as I said before, eye color, doesn't matter, Hannah." He let out a heavy sigh, "I had hoped you would listen to me. There are so many things that could have been easily resolved if you just had."
I just stood there, locked in his gaze. Dr. Cole—this whole time, why didn't I see! How could I not have from the very beginning! His tie and so many other things! I...I should have known! I WAS SUPPOSE TO HAVE KNOWN! All this time, I thought I would recognize him if...when I ran into him from all my memories and everything. Yet I had refused to see it and had based so much on trivial things I thought I knew. I had made excuses.
I furrowed my brow, after what had just happened, none of this mattered right now. I wasn't sure if it hadn't sunk in yet or I was dissociating from what he had done. What he had done. What Dr. Cole had done. My parents had been violently murdered right in front of me and were dead. I felt so strange; everything felt strange, I felt like I was in one of my dreams and would wake up at any moment. Yet I knew this was real. I began to shake as tears poured down my cheeks. I managed to look away from him and stared down at my mother's blood on the floor. I was standing in it now. I looked back up, then down again. There was still a sliver of hope.
"I want to wake up now." I said.
"No Hannah, you are not dreaming." said Dr. Cole. "This isn't something you can deny nor run away from. I had hoped things wouldn't get to this extent, but there isn't anything, I'm not willing to do in order to 'treat' a patient. Even one as destructive as yourself." He let out another sigh, stretched then said, "Now then, it's time you face your actions and accept the consequences."
"Consequences."
"Yes," he said with a sigh, "actions have consequences. You made me a promise and then you broke it. I told you not to run away anymore or try and escape, that your place was here with me. But you failed to listen and follow your treatment plan. Stubborn as you are, I doubt changing your wellness level and putting you in the basement is going to cut it. No, no I think for you I shall have to get inventive and take something away."
"Take something away!" I spat, "You. You just killed my parents!" My heart sunk saying it out loud. He'd just killed my-
"You left me no choice." he shrugged. "And that, this," he said gesturing around him, "Is the consequence of your lies. Now for breaking a promise to me and trying to escape yet again, I think the price will have to be steeper, something you wont ever forget." He looked me up then down. "I think I shall take your leg that way not only will you never forget but you wont be able to run away, even if you do. If you can't keep a promise on your own Hannah then I'll help you." He stared me down as he dug into his pants pocket and pulled out his own massive set of keys. He jingled them about and smiled.
"You're-" I stopped speaking and turned myself around.
I didn't waste time calling him crazy. Clearly that had been established long before this point! I clutched my crutches tightly and forced myself to move as fast as I could. Knowing him, he knew exactly what damn key went in that security gate, and it would only take him a second to open it. With my injuries, I knew I couldn't outrun him. I needed to...to find some place to hide or a weapon. A real weapon! I doubt he'd let me hide behind a wall and whack him with my wooden crutches like Nurse Violet.
I also realized I wasn't dealing with just anyone here. I was dealing with the Shadow Man., Urel! I knew him from my nightmares and various lives. He was relentless and wouldn't stop this until we were both dead. I managed to get around a corner as I heard the gate squeak open.
He called out to me. "You're getting better with those but where do you think you're going?"
I continued even faster and tried not to slip. I looked for the first door I could find then tried to open it. I found it was locked and glanced back half-expecting to see Dr. Cole, but he'd yet to come around the corner. What I did see was the trail of blood I was leaving behind me,
"Mnn shit!" I cursed.
Okay change of plans! I couldn't outrun him and I obviously couldn't hide with all this blood. So weapon it was! I needed a gun, a multiple round rapid firing gun like that one in that movie my parents had taken me to. My parents...my parents, flashes of what just happened flashed through my mind. My fathers screams, the blood and the look in my mothers eyes. I trembled but heard Dr. Cole begin to whistle as he came around the corner.
He looked absolutely crazed like Dr. Cole had checked out and Dr. Psycho was in. He was twirling the bloody fire ax like he was leader in a marching band. I vaguely remember a double sided ax from a few of my lives and realized it was his weapon of choice.
"NO! NO! NO! NO!" I screamed.
I forced myself to hobble on once again as fast as I could. I focused my thoughts on just finding some place, some door I could put between him and me until I could get my hands on a weapon. I realized after a good minute or two he should have caught me by now. I got to another corner I could turn down but dared to looked back. He was walking ever so slowly, toying with me! When our eyes met, he smiled and began to hum a strange, haunting tune.
I went around the corner and kept going. My mind and heat raced with everything that had just happened, who he was and what he was going to do when he got me. I knew, I knew I wasn't going to get away. Just like my parents, I didn't stand a chance! My best bet was to take myself out before he got to me because when he did. I roared refusing to think about what he'd do if he got his hands on me.
He...he couldn't be serious about taking a leg, right! Had he ever done something like that before. I scrambled to think recalling he'd taken my tongue before. I remembered some life, where we were performers and he called me a liar before cutting my tongue out. I wouldn't put it past him to take my leg or kill me!
I flared my nostrils and my muscles aching something fierce as I pushed myself to keep going at all costs. I hadn't found my love yet or our friends. I couldn't die yet not like this. No! This couldn't be it. I had to keep fighting for them and for myself. I reached some double doors and tried to open them but they were locked up tight.
"Not that door, love." he said taking a moment to lean up against the wall. It was like he was amused by my feeble attempts to survive. "You don't need you medication right now. We want you wide awake!"
We? Medication! This must have been where they kept all the meds. If the door wasn't locked maybe I could give him a syringe and sedate his ass. I knew I'd do more then that if I could get my hands on that fire ax but the door was locked so this was pointless. I turned and move down another long hall. He got off the wall and continued to switch between humming and whistling as he twirled the fire ax about.
I saw a nurse come around the corner. She saw me then saw Dr. Cole and turned right around. I tried to go after her and ask for help but when I got around the corner, I found the hall completely empty. Yeah I would have run too. I let out a groan but moved on. Dr. Cole always stayed just a few paces behind me. Part of me began to wish he'd just get it over with. He was driving me crazy with this game of cat and mouse. This hospital was a fucking maze. He loved mazes. He loved building elaborate traps. And most of all he loved chasing me. I was flooded with even more memories now wasn't the time.
"STOP IT!" I screamed at him and myself. I really, really wished this was a nightmare I could wake up from!
"Stop it," he repeated, "Stop it. I told you to stop it!" called Dr. Cole. "THIS RIGHT HERE IS ALL OF YOUR FAULT, HANNAH! I made you promise me. I made you swear you understood! Yet time and time again you can't keep your word. I should have known. It's inconsistencies like this that are your ruin. You're never going to get better Hannah if you keep lying all the time and denying what needs to be done!"
I kept going and tried not to listen to him as he slowly followed after me, swinging that bloody fire ax. "This none of this, right here, had to happen! You parents could have lived out their entire miserable little lives but noooo. You had to go and call them! You brought them here, Hannah! When they had no reason to come. They signed the paperwork, they handed their proxy of you over to me, months ago. That makes you mine and mine alone, Hannah. Don't you see they abandoned you. They never lover you or cared for you like I can. They gave you to me and we had no further use of them but no you had to go and get them all worked up. Tell me Hannah, what did you say to your mother. To get your father to drive three days straight!"
I didn't respond and he called out to me "Hannah! Are you there or have you gone off again. We really need to work on your attention span! I asked you a question!"
"I TOLD HER THE TRUTH." I bitterly spat.
"Truth! You have no truths!" I glanced back, he was getting to close now, no longer keeping his distance. He rolled his shoulders. "You dumb twat know nothing but lies. You spin them day and night causing chaos for all those around you but fret not I'll take care of it, just as I take care of everything around here!"
He swung the ax again and puffed up his chest as he drew even closer. I frantically searched for another door, another place could escape to, but I knew this was pointless. Injured like this, I couldn't get away. Even if I was at the top of my game, I still wouldn't have stood a chance. For we were cursed to repeat this endless madness. That's what this was—madness.
"Now which leg should I take!" he teased.
"DON'T! DON'T DO THIS!"
"Do what?" he laughed, "What am I doing now? What has your broken little mind come up with this time."
"You have a choice too!" I sputtered remembering an earlier conversation we had. "You don't have to...to do this!"
"You have a choice Hannah, sadly I do not" He said somberly, "As a doctor it is my duty to attend to you, no matter how I feel. Your care is of upmost importance!"
'Bullshit!' I thought before realizing I had reached a dead end. I had been so focused on what he had been saying that I hand't realized there was nowhere else to turn. There was just a single door at the end of this hall. I bit my lip and tried it, having no other options. Thankfully, it was unlocked and I managed to get inside. I quickly shut the door behind me, and locked it.
A wave of momentarily relief washed over me. I was happy to put some distance between us, even if it was just a door. He was still talking but it was muffled now. I ran my hands over a light switch and an old bulb flicked on. I took a moment to rest and looked around. I was in some sort of old dusty storage room.
There had to be something in here I could use! After a minute or so, I moved again and my body nearly gave out on me. I realized I shouldn't have taken a moment to rest. I needed to keep my momentum if I even had a sliver of a chance. It wasn't easy— my arm pits hurt so bad as I hobbled forward, and I felt like I was going to be sick from everything.
Several sharp knocks pulled me from my thoughts. For a second I almost turned and instinctively opened the door, like an idiot! I smacked the palm of my hand against my forehead and realized I was getting tired. I was making mistakes and I couldn't afford to make right now. I needed to find a weapon and fast.
I took several hobbles forward and heard the door handle rattle. Again he was toying with me. I wouldn't allow myself to get distracted again. I looked around seeing some old paint cans and several dusty sheets over furniture. There was a table with some nails laying out. Maybe I could throw them at him or put them in between my knuckles I picked some up but jumped and dropped them as Dr. Cole's ax came swinging through the door.
He kept chopping until he made a hole then put his hand through and tried to get at the lock. I moved towards the door and lifted up one of my crutches. I hit his hand with it and he cried out, "OW! THAT HURTS! Don't tell me you've become violent now!"
I just screamed at him. My voice cut out from over using it but I didn't care. I screamed again and tried to hit his hand as he stuck it through the hole once more. However this time he grabbed hold of my crutch and wouldn't let go of it. He yanked it through the hole and I had to let go or I would have fallen. I only had one crutch now and a second later he put another hole in the door. I scrambled back. It was harder now with only one crutch.
He got his hand through the much bigger hole and unlocked the door. He opened it, not that there was much left of the door now. I backed up and grabbed some nails, chucking them at him as hard as I could. They didn't go very far, and I think out of the half a dozen I'd thrown maybe one of them got to him. It didn't hurt or even deter him. If anything, he looked at me like I was an idiot. Maybe I was. I just stood there for a second, feeling so tired.
"I think you've had enough fun for today. It's time to wrap things up."
"Fun!" I spat back at him. "You killed my parents, you sick bastard!"
He laughed, "Again you gave me no choice with an outburst like that. What did you think was going to happen? How could you lie and say such nasty things about me, after all I have done for you."
"They're not lies!" I spat. "You have been drugging and raping me!"
"I-" He lifted his finger up. I watch one of his eyes twitch as he shook with fury and protested "I have never touched a hair on your head!"
"You know that isn't true!" I shook my head and couldn't help myself, "You're crazy!"
"I am not crazy." he said. "You don't know crazy! You can't even admit you're unwell!"
I stumbled back as he took a step towards me. I saw something on a shelf. A hammer! Of course to go with the nails! I picked it up since I had a free hand now then I pointed it at him and spat, "Stay away from me. Don't come any closer."
His eyes lit up and the smile on his face grew nearly ear to hear. He looked at the hammer then me and said, "I hate to break it to you but since losing your eye, your depth perception has gone downhill, my dear. My axe," he said moving it about, "Has a much longer reach then your little hammer. I'd get to you way before you had a chance of swinging on me!"
"So, so, I'll throw it!"
"Oh like you did those nails!" He said looking at me with such a strange expression.
It was almost loving and unnerving as fuck. We were fighting. He was trying to hurt me and I was defending myself. Yet he seemed beyond elated. I pursed my lips trying to think of what else I could do. He gave me time folding his arms in front of himself.
He tapped his foot as I said, "I'll- I'll-"
I recalled several life times where we had fought. He almost always won even with my powers. He had powers of his own but most importantly he was good at anticipating my next move. Then again most times he had trained me.
"You'll what?" he said trying to keep me focused. "Come on let's hear it. You'll-"
We were only steps apart barely an arm's length. I swallowed then pulled the hammer back slightly, "Maybe I'll use it one myself."
Again he lit up, "A hammer! A hammer. She wants to use a hammer on herself. I knew you were simple, but this is an entirely different level of stupidity, love. If, if mind you, you somehow managed to get a swing on yourself before I got to you, it wont kill you, but it will hurt. Hmm, perhaps that is what you're aiming for. I'm beginning to think you have masochistic tendencies, Hannah. We shall have to explore that and so many other things at our next session. Your parents alone should take up a quite a few. Frankly," he said taking a slow step forward, "I am surprised you invited them here, given how you feel about them. Hmm, perhaps," he said drawing closer, "perhaps subconsciously this was your intent all along, luring them here, knowing I wont ever let you go and that I would 'take care' of them for you. Yes, you might want to give that some thought!"
"NO!" I shouted. He was twisting things. "I NEVER WANTED THIS! I JUST WANTED TO GET OUT OF HERE AND AWAY FROM YOU!"
"Well that is not going to happen. NOT NOW NOR EVER!" He shouted, his eyes flickered with fury then he turned his attention to my legs. He moved his ax back in forth as he continued "I'll make sure of it! No one is ever going to take you away from me— not those morons, your parents, nor the police. And most of all, not even you Hannah."
He face fell flat and he lunged forward so fast I didn't have time to react. He grabbed the hammer and yanked it from my grasp, violently pushing me. I fell to the floor as he tossed the hammer over his shoulder and out of the room. He was now standing over me and I shuttered. He had made his intentions, very clear. Things started to sink in as I sat there. I couldn't escape on my own and with my parents gone I had no one left to come and save me. I really wasn't getting out of here anytime soon...if ever.
I got upset and shouted, "I HATE YOU!"
"HATE! Is such a strong word Hannah. You have no reason to hate me."
"Don't you- Can't you see how FUCKING CRAZY YOU ARE! Some part of you has to know this is wrong! After reading all my journals... knowing who you are and what we've gone through you should-!" I paused realizing what I was saying, "You! I gasped, "Dr. Cole!"
"Yes Hannah," he said glaring down at me.
"I have proof. You said you'd let me go if I had proof. You, you are my proof."
He scoffed and shook his head, "Oh, Hannah, Hannah, Hannah, there was never going to be any proof. Just because I'm not wearing my contact means nothing, blue eyes are just blue eyes. Your dreams are simply grand delusions of a broken mind. There are no other lives, only this one. You have no lost love or friends. I am not the Shadow Man. I'll admit we may share some characteristics but so do countless others. As I've said before your criteria for "finding others" is far too vague. Look hard enough at anything and you'll eventually find what you're looking for. No this little exercise was suppose to make you realize there is no proof because there is nothing that can be proven. It's all in your head, Hannah" He let out a heavy sigh "Yet again you have failed."
"NO!" I shouted. "YOU ARE HIM!" I couldn't believe this! Even after everything, Dr. Cole still didn't believe! The Shadow Man, Urel didn't know who he was...no didn't accept! I hadn't anticipated this that one day I could run into him and he wouldn't...wouldn't be awakened. Yes, he was still asleep!
He shook his head pulling me from my thoughts. He calmly responded, "No Hannah, I am not him. He doesn't exist! I am not obsessed with you, Hannah. Nor in love with you. I am not bent on taking over the world. There is no mystery, no great conspiracy here, you are not cursed. You are not special in any way. I am simply your doctor and you are having a psychotic break!"
I wasn't having a psychotic break! Seriously! If anything, he was! Oh what was the term when you were feeling something but said another person was feeling it, instead. I knew the word—Dr. Phillipston had used it on me before to say I was "projecting!" That's it! Dr. Cole was clearly projecting.
Dr. Phillipston had said it was some sort of defense mechanism when you refused to accept their own thoughts and feelings, they put them on to someone else. I wasn't jealous—they were. I wasn't crazy—it was everyone else. I didn't think it had worked for me but felt it fit perfectly for Dr. Cole. I bit my lip, thinking this wasn't helping at all. So what if I knew what Dr. Cole was doing. It didn't get me out of this fucking situation!
Speaking of which, Dr. Cole raised the fire ax pulling me from my thoughts. I fully expected him to start swinging and froze. I knew I should fight, run, curse, do something —anything— but I just froze, looking up at him.
"Now then." He hissed as he moved in close, hovering the ax back and forth over my legs. "Which shall it be? Which shall it be?"
He kept moving the ax back and forth but I realized he wasn't looking at his legs, he was looking at me. Nay he was fixated on me. We locked eyes and I had a feeling he was still toying with me. He was waiting for something, some response, or reaction on my part. Did he want me to cry out, plead, beg, or apologize. Did he want me to grovel at his feet so all could be forgiven? I recalled other lives where I had done this with various outcomes but this wasn't some other life. I realized this was my life right here and now and I did still have a choice. What did I want to do.
I didn't say anything even as he edge closer with the ax. I felt the blade on my good leg but he still hadn't taken his eyes off me. He licked the stop row of his teeth and I gave him my fiercest look, showing I wasn't afraid of him! Oh no I was terrified of him. I knew just what he could do from years of memories but in this moment I was too angry to succumb. I refused to bend or breakdown. I may have no power or control in this moment but I wouldn't cry, whimper nor beg. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction! If...if he wanted to hurt me even kill me so so be i-
He pulled the fire ax back, and I held my breath. Then suddenly, he threw the it across the room, surprising me. I turned my head to see where it had landed and watched it slide under an old wardrobe. He dropped to his knees before me then, taking hold of my cheeks with both his hands. He forcefully turned my head so that I would look at him and yelled.
"YOU HAVEN'T BEEN A VERY GOOD PATIENT HANNAH! I THINK- I THINK IT'S TIME YOU TOOK YOUR MEDICATION!"
All of a sudden, he looked even more crazed as he let go of me and then adjusted his tie. A second later, it came undone. He pulling off his doctor's coat and let it fall to the floor. He didn't take his eyes off me as he began unbuttoned his suit jacket and allowed it to also fall on the floor. I realized what he was doing as he began to unbutton his shirt.
I pulled back and tried to drag myself away from him as I yelled, "NO!"
He quickly finished unbuttoning his shirt, then slid off his suspenders. I dragged myself further back. I hit some covered table as he slid off his undershirt then reached for his belt and spoke. "Time and time again you have disobeyed my treatment." He dropped his pants down and then began to crawl towards me, "I've tried to be patient and understanding. I've been rather reasonable I think."
Patient, understanding and reasonable where all the things he was not! I grab my last crutch that had fallen to the floor when I had and tried to hit him with it. He dodged it, then again before grabbing it and yanking it away as he had the other one. He threw the crutch behind him just as he had the hammer then pulled himself out. I saw it then. I realizing I had yet to fully gaze upon it and yet it strangely looked familiar. Perhaps I had seen it before and forgotten. The thought made me sick but his poised member made me sicker. It was like a treacherous snake about to bite.
I'd had hundreds of nightmare like this but they were nothing compared to the real thing. I struggled to hold it together and kept fighting. With my good leg I kicked him in the chest. It hit good and hard hard and he let out painful grunt. I kept on kicking but he caught the next one kick and didn't let go. He dragged me to him just as he had with my crutches. I couldn't help but scream as he loomed over me. It struggled beneath him and managed to get my foot free of his grasp. I rolled over and squirmed out underneath.
I drag myself forward on my stomach as he hissed at me through gritted teeth. "But ever step of the way you've been defiant!"
He grasped hold my hospital grown from behind with one hand and tore it away. I screamed but kept trying to crawl away. I heard him get up and hoped he'd give up but knew he hadn't. I heard the sound of his belt again as I dragged myself forward several inches. I turned back to see he had his belt in his hands. He stood over me then crouched down and wrapped it around my neck notching it. He yanked it tight as he roared, "YOU'VE LEFT ME NO CHOICE BUT TO DISCIPLINE YOU!"
"Nooo-" I gasped as he tightened the belt cutting me off. I moved my hands to the belt and madly clawed at it trying to get it off.
He dropped down placing his knees on either side of me and yelled once more. "YOU WILL LEARN YOUR PLACE IN THIS WORLD HANNAH! MY WORLD! YOU WILL COME TO LEARN THAT I AND ONLY I KNOW WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU OR!" I could feel him lie down on me. My good leg was up from trying to craw away and I felt his member jab at my entrance from behind. I tried to struggle free but he yanked on the belt nearly cutting off my oxygen. He forced himself inside me from behind and groaned, "You will suffer...suf...the…consequences. Shit"
I bore down on him as he jutted into me. It hurt so much. I could hear him grunt and groan as he cursed under his breath. He pulled on the belt tighter calling out. "Let up! Let up you dumb twat!"
I started to feel light headed and black out for a few seconds. I came too with my face on the floor and him pounding into me. The belt was looser and I cried out. He slapped me from behind and yelled, "Shut up. Just lie there and take it, take it, uh, uhh!"
He gathered my hips up I felt so sick and weak. I could feel his balls slap against me everything we collided and I wept. I lost it breaking down beneath him as he ground into me. "Uhh, uhh, uhh Hannah, Hannah, oh I've missed this, uhhh, uhhh fuck. Hannah, Hannah." He grunted and groaned as I dug my nails into the wooden floor. My thought grew dark and I thought I would have preferred if he had chopped me up. This pain...this violation was unbearable.
I sobbed even louder and he tangled his fingers in my hair. He jerked my head back and yanked on the belt. I almost past out again. He was such a fucking coward! Piece of shit! I realized he needed me to be incapacitated to get his rocks off. I felt my insides burn with each strike and it felt like he was tearing me apart. His thrust were frenzied and unrelenting. He show me no mercy as he raped me
I saw his hand fall beside my head and could see it had blood on it. I realized he was raping me covered in my parents blood. It was too much. I vomited as I struggled with the pain, physically, mentally and emotionally. He didn't stop even as I pissed myself a few seconds later. He just kept going undeterred by the filth. Nothing mattered right now but what he wanted. It was always like this with him. When he wanted it, he'd have it and there was nothing I or anyone could do. I felt my breaths stagger as my heart pounding in my chest.
Dr. Cole roared out, "IT-IT'S POINTLESS!
He let my hips fall back on the floor and followed them. He pressed into me deeper, slamming me against the floor as he continued to roar, "IT'S POINTLESS TO RESIST YOUR TREATMENT, HANNAH! If I have to, I will hold you down but you will." He grunted and groaned crashing into my body. "Take your medicine. Take your medicine" He bucked harder and I realized he must be close and I was right. Less then a second later he lost himself between my folds and let out such grunts and groans of pleasure, "UHHH! UHH! FUCK! UHH! FUCK THIS TWAT!"
He didn't hold back ravaging my delicate hole. I soon felt moisture as my body broke beneath him. It felt like a lot and I wasn't sure of how much of it was him or my own blood. "Hannah, Hannah," he sung out my name, "I love you."
He bucked into me one last time then kissed my shoulder. At least it stated out as a kiss before he bore his teeth into me. Again I knew this, knew what it felt like to have his teeth tear into me. He always liked to leave his mark when he could. Up until this point, he probably couldn't have risked it as not to raise my suspicion but now, nothing was holding him back. He tore into me as he had my body.
I cried out and he covered my mouth with his hand. He kept biting grinding his teeth deep into my flesh, making sure he'd leave a last mark. I began to worry he'd never let go. When he finally did he let go of my mouth as well. He allowed me to fall in my own vomit on the floor and pulled from me completely getting to his feet.
"I- What happened? My glasses, I need my glasses! Where are my glasses?" He suddenly seemed confused.
"You left them in the hall."
"The hall, right."
I turned my head to the side, wondering who he was talking to. Had another person been here watching him rape me. I looked but didn't see anyone else, it was just him and me. I was confused.
"Clean up your mess, now."
"Yes, we need to. I should call Hogan.
"Yes, Hogan can take care of that other mess."
"Yes."
Again I looked for someone else, were they speaking over the intercom. They must have been. Yet I heard Dr. Cole use it a moment later. "Nurse Lindsey."
"Dr. Cole? Is that you?"
"Yes," said Dr. Cole. "I need you to locate Hogan for me."
"He's looking for you. I think he said he'd be in your office."
"Thank you, oh and order a full lock down. I don't wan anyone wandering the halls"
"Yes, sir, is everything alright? I heard screaming."
"Yes it has been taken care of," he said.
He pushed some more buttons. "Hogan."
"Callum, where are you!" called Hogan. He sounded worried. It was strange to hear him worried.
Dr. Cole ran a hand through his hair then said "Everything is under control."
"Where are you!" Hogan demanded again.
"Attending to a patient. It has led to a bit of a mess."
"Callum," called Hogan.
"It's quite alright but you'll want to clean up in front of my office. I'm sure you can follow the trail. Once that's taken care of bring me a pair of sunglasses and a new set of clothes to washroom, twenty three, I belive. Oh and after you finish cleaning up, do prep an operation room. I'll be doing a surgery once I'm all cleaned up."
He pulled his hand from the button and I heard several clicks as Hogan called out, "Callum. Callum. Where are you?"
Dr. Cole didn't respond. He simple got dressed then picked me up from the floor. I didn't say anything. I felt oddly numb given everything that had happened. He carried me somewhere, I didn't really pay attention. I wasn't really sure what was going on. I just kept getting flashes of it like taking pictures. My father, mother, the chase, the rape...two voice, from one man. I furrowed my brow as he set me down on a cement floor. He ran his hands over me and squeezed one of my breasts before he got up and started a bath.
He undressed then gathered up some towels as I laid on the floor. Every so often he would stand over me and leer down at me. Sometimes he would whisper and stroke himself. I knew he was working himself up to do it again. I just looked up at the ceiling not saying a word. I shouldn't have let things go so easily. There were so many other factors and things that were so clear to me now but I'd just assumed and dismissed them because his eyes were brown. His eye color, his eyes color. I shouldn't have called my mom. This...this was all my fault. I let out a maddening laugh before sinking into my thoughts once more.
Dr. Cole, had said he'd see to my release if I could prove I wasn't crazy. If I could prove my dreams were real. Now, here before me was my proof, yet in finding my infallible proof, I realized I'd condemned myself, because I knew him. I knew Urel wouldn't ever let me go. It was so horrible, so sad and yet struck me as funny...funny in this moment, that I should have missed something so obvious time and time again. Perhaps it was part of the curse that I was so obvious or maybe I just didn't want to see it. I had been so focused on getting out of her, on my love and our friends. I didn't want to run into anyone else but it was not my a choice I could make. I was not in control of who found who, and when.
I realized I was lucky to have found my love in our last life to have gotten married and have our family for as long as we did. All those years had seemed short, my children had all been so young when Urel had crashed into us but at least for a time I had known such happiness and peace Something that wouldn't be afforded to me in this life not now that we had found each other. I kept madly laughing and crying off and on. Dr. Cole grew annoyed as he checked on my bad leg.
"What?" he hissed, "What is so funny?"
"What isn't." I rasped my throat raw. My voice barely came out in a whisper. I laughed again and he groaned as I continued. "Do you- Do you still not see it? After everything how can you still not believe."
"ENOUGH OF THAT!" He spat. Dr. Cole grabbed the sides of my mouth and tightly squeezed. "I don't want to hear any more of that nonsense! Do you understand me! You are done! It's over, you proved nothing!"
He let go of me and I just smiled up at him and said, "Now who's in denial."
His eyes went wide and he flared his nostrils. He looked like he wanted to hit me but let out heavy sigh and pulled away from me. He checked on the water then gathering up some soaps, hair wash and medical supplies. Tears streamed down my cheeks as I watched steam rise up from the bathtub. Even as things seemed more dismal then ever, I still had hope. I knew I might be crazy but...I knew just as I had run into the Shadow Man, Urel. I knew I would one day run into my love, Luka and the others. However I quickly realized I could no longer keep my vow to search for them. No, they, they were going to have to find me.
The End
|
